Sadness

A lot of times I get angry at what people say to me in my times of sadness because I need time to wallow and process things. I have never been and probably never will be the person to always see the positive side of things immediately.

Especially when it comes to things dear to myself and my goals. Yeah, you can argue that people are just trying to comfort me, but in that case, I'd rather one not try. Leaving me and my feelings alone is a good and empathetic move. Don't tell me to move on and tell me that the opportunity will come again. If those things were true in my situation, I'd know to not wallow but to wait for it the next time it comes. But sometimes, things don't come a second time. I'm beginning to think people say it just so that they can communicate with the usual me instead of having to deal with my feelings.

I'm only human, and I am one who feels everything. I can even feel when things are going south. So don't tell me about thinking positive. Do you know how hard that is for someone so intuned with that feeling of knowing something is wrong? You have no idea.

This rant has no moral of the story. But maybe try not to tell your loved one to get over it if they need time. You wouldn't tell someone to get over it after the loss of something they love, will you? Same same.

Taking inspiration from Kiki, I'll find a way. Take it in stride and move on to something else that I love equally. And maybe taking inspiration from Liu Wen, I should go forge my own path even though I wasn't first pick.

I'm just a little sad today and I would appreciate if everyone leaves me and my feelings alone.

Hindsight 20/20?

In my research of Bangkok, I somehow ended up searching for art museums in Jakarta and I only have three words -

遺憾死.

Yeah. Turns out Jakarta has a really international and new modern arts scene and this nut here didn't do research in the correct direction. Wtf was my problem anyways, keep searching for food food food UGH.

Guess this just means I have to do better research for my next DWP!! HAHAHA. I feel like going, but I wanna go in a big group this time 'round. >:

The wheels of change have been set in motion and there's nothing I can do about it but go with the flow, or, well (hehe Orwell), risk being crushed if I resist.

Received a letter that made me cry second time in my life (first being the congratulatory letter for Pengakap Raja).

Well... I think that's it. Not quite sure what I'm doing but I'm just gonna keep... doing whatever I'm doing.

NOBODY TOUCHA MY SPAGHET.