My Strong Heart

I think after all the blows it has received, my heart has grown stronger. I can climb back up and walk away quite quickly, but I have yet to master leaving memories behind as well.

About a year ago, I spoke to this Spanish (?) dude who was on an exchange in Amsterdam, travelling London. We were both felling a bit eh and stayed in that day. That's how we started talking, it was quite funny really. He's also really cute and has a very cute smile. I remember he enjoys watching Japanese New Year game shows and he really likes cold weather. I also remember he slept in boxers in the dorm and he was really hairy HAHAHA. We never exchanged contacts and a part of me regrets it, but what's the point really?

This year, I exchanged contacts with a guy and the question arises again, what's the point?

Maybe the view someone presented to me about having someone to reach out to when you're in a foreign land is one way to look at it, but to me, I hate fleeting connections. I absolutely hate them especially when I feel this connection wasn't meant to be brief. Is there really a point?

Maybe I should act like I can't speak the next time I'm travelling.

Anyways, my heart is still soft as a tofu and nothing much has changed since a year ago. Well, not really, quite a lot has changed. I've been surrounded with wholesome love from some of the most wonderful people I never expected to love THIS MUCH *spreads my arms wide open* which has helped shape my beliefs and maybe even change them.

Good guy friends are really important for girls. And I'm eternally grateful for these uncles for coming into my life.

I remember my midnight blogging days when I was filled with so much rage and sadness. Now, all I have in me is love with a hint of nostalgia. Life, is alright.

My strong heart will brave through it all.

~

On a side note, Flume made my heart weak with Mura Masa T_T This was a bit like the Petit Biscuit experience I had on a random road trip that seemed so long ago. Except, I can't really hug Flume la HAHAHA.

I think the best ridiculously insignificant moment I had on this trip was when I helped these cool kids who were struggling with a squad selfie take a sick 拜神 photo (in their words k!) HAHAHA. Heard them saying "so nice. Unlike Singaporean..." when I ran away looking for a toilet HAHAHA.

About a week ago I also took a photo for a tourist at Masjid Negara which made her look tall. She tried to return the favour which was super sweet.

I absolutely love helping people take photos because I understand the struggle, provided I'm not in a terrible mood HAHA. You'd be surprised how many times I get rejected when I offer help, but it's all cool when the ones I do help are super happy with their photos. Some of them don't really know how to say thank you or be appreciative which is also an experience in itself.

No regrets going on this trip, but I can feel my soul growing older and older.

我真的老了。在这样下去，我脆弱的心有可能会受不了了。